Learning Happiness 2: Actively plan for your happiness

In the previous post, I talked about understanding how happiness feels for you, as it is different for everybody.  Now, I’d like to focus on what makes you happy.

Personally, I seem to know more about what makes me unhappy, rather than what makes me happy.  But I have been working on changing this.

For example, I love to be outdoors.  Whether it’s sitting in the rocking chair on my porch watching the birds eat at the feeders, or taking a long walk in the park, I feel happy when I’m enjoying nature.  In this case, I’m not feeling a giddy happiness, but rather a peaceful and content one.

Unfortunately, I don’t put enough “outdoor time” in my calendar and therefore, I forget it.  I haven’t made it a goal, with appropriate action steps.

Learning happiness requires planning.

First, you need to be aware of what makes you happy.  Then you need to plan how and when to bring these activities into your life.

That’s why this exercise is so important.

Step 1:  List five healthy things in your life that make you happy.  If you can’t think of five, that’s okay; just write down as many as you can.  I included the word “healthy” here because you don’t want to invite the “Guilt Monster” to visit along with the happiness. Otherwise, peanut M&Ms might top my list.

Step 2:  Look at your list. On a scale of 1 to 10, with 10 being the highest, rate each of these according to how often you allow yourself to experience them.

Step 3:  Look at the ones you rated below five (ones you’re not doing frequently).  Pick the one that feels most important to you right now.

Step 4:  Write one or two action steps you can take that would help you do this activity more often.  Be sure to set specific dates for achieving these steps.  Setting dates makes an action more tangible.  If you use a calendar, it’s even better to write your action steps in your calendar.

I recommend you do this exercise regularly. Keep a list of the things that make you happy.  Eventually, you may collect a list of 14,000 things to be happy about! Barbara Ann Kipfer has written a book by this very title and I have mentioned it in a previous post on learning happiness.

I believe we are born with the natural ability to be happy. It’s a myth that we must wait around until, by some lucky chance, it finds us.  We CAN learn to increase happiness, but it takes work.  We have to seek it out and then practice it.  The more we do this, the more opportunities we will have to be happy.

Tagged as: attracting happiness, happiness, Happiness is Learned, learning happiness, life happiness