Hi Sara – wonderful photo … so clear high up above the clouds of early night … I love it when the stars are out – so bright and light … but the sunset or sunrise clouds give us such wonderful cloudscapes … cheers Hilary
Hilary Melton-Butcher´s last blog post ..Oak Galls and Theophilus Presbyter …
…First star I see tonight. I wish I may, I wish I might, Have this wish I wish tonight.
Lovely, Sara. I’m glad you are posting again. Hope you are well – I’ve missed you.
Hi, Sara. Couldn’t sleep. A friend told me today that she no longer wished to Skype with me or speak on the phone because of my ‘energy’. I understood. I am too intense, negative, judgemental and I vent too often, like a pressure cooker. (I do most of the caring for my father who is 92 and fading slowly and painfully, with fear, sadness, loneliness and anger; my beautiful kids have both left home to study and my life is getting harder daily. It’s still a blessed life compared with most people’s lives in a struggling world, but my helplessness to alleviate their suffering just makes me feel sadder; comparisons don’t help.) I’ve always known I’m difficult. Being creative and introverted doesn’t help; I’m complex, introspective and probably obsessively self centred. For years I’ve been living on the shores of depression. It’s why I write, to find the essence of my best self, my strongest self. I couldn’t sleep. I logged on, first time in six months. I needed the solace of seeing my blog, a life-album in words and pictures, comments from online friends, and quotes I chose for my pieces that sum up my life better than I can. My blog has disappeared. My server has locked me out. I went to my email inbox to see if I could find sense there, or an explanation. Nothing. But I found emails telling me you’re online again and that stopped me crying. Your star made me marvel at the miracle of synchronicity. Like Lynn, I’ve missed you, too. I’m glad you’re back. Tomorrow I’ll tackle the technology…again… and try to find my blog. But for now I’ll sleep more soundly, knowing there’s always a home here for deciduous bloggers like me. It’s cloudy where I live tonight, but your star’s perfect for making a wish on. A new start.
I don’t know if you’ll get this because I’m obviously late in replying. It’s odd because I haven’t been allowing comments, but reading yours made me realize sometimes comments are connections. I am so sorry you’re struggling right now. I know this is weird, but it sounds like you’ve got a case of life’s hiccups. You know how annoying hiccups can be — you hold your breath, you dance on one foot, you try to touch your nose with your tongue…but the darn hiccups just keep happening! I don’t have a sure cure, but I do recommend you sit quietly with yourself, hopefully someplace in nature. Try not to think about the things that are hurting or frustrating you (the hiccups). Instead, just listen to the birds, look at the sky and feel your connection with this place we call earth. Let yourself be part of it and feel the peace. Concentrate on being in that place and nowhere else. Someone once told me a similar thing when I was struggling. He also told me you can’t feel awe and annoyance at the same time. So, go for the awe:~) Also, thanks for reminding that blogging is a connection.
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