Holiday Blues

photo by sara b. healy

You are not accidental. Existence needs you. Without you something will be missing in existence and nobody can replace it. That’s what gives you dignity, that the whole existence will miss you. The stars and sun and moon, the trees and birds and earth – everything in the universe will feel a small place is vacant which cannot be filled by anybody except you. OSHO

This is one of my favorite quotes. I put it up today because, for some, the holidays will not be joyful and happy. I don’t mean to be a spoil sport, but the reality is this holiday season…

Some of us will feel lost.
Some of us will be alone.
Some of us will feel sad.
Some of us will be forgotten.

Take a few minutes to read this message again.

“You are not accidental. Existence needs you. Without you something will be missing in existence and nobody can replace it.” ~ OSHO

Absorb these words into your heart.
Remember them.
Repeat them.
And don’t forget to…

Share them.

In the hectic days of the holidays, take time to notice people around you. When you come across someone who’s not in the “holiday spirit” or who seems kind of sad, overworked, or just lonely, give them the gift of these words. Remind them of how essential they are to you, to the world, and to the Universe.

Let these powerful words light a warming fire in someone’s soul this holiday season:~)

2011 Thank You

Thank you to all of you who visited A Sharing Connection this year. Whether you left a comment or stopped by briefly, you are very much appreciated!

Also, I want to thank the people whose words of wisdom helped me this year. Through your comments and your posts, I have gained so much from what you’ve shared with me.

The blogosphere is such a unique space. It allows us the freedom to test our creativity, to express our points of view, and to share our commonalities. I look forward to continuing to share this space with you in 2012.

I wish you all a very happy NEW YEAR.

Thinking Thursday: Different Paths

Styles of Learning

“There are many paths to the top of the mountain, but the view is always the same” ~ Chinese Proverb

When I got my camera, I only used the manual to learn where to put the batteries, how to turn it on, and what button to press to take a picture.

Then, off I went to give it a try. When the pictures started coming out blurry, I turned to the manual to find out why.

One the first things I learned was how to adjust the Diopter Correction knob, which allows the camera to adjust to my eyesight without my glasses. My pictures greatly improved! Since then, I’ve returned to the manual many times, but always after I’ve gotten stuck.

My natural style of learning is called an active learner. I do best when I learn by doing.

This doesn’t mean I do everything without instruction or manuals, but I prefer this style. For example, if I wanted to learn to fly an airplane, I wouldn’t get into the airplane and take off. I would first seek out an instructor. I might be an “active learner,” but I also want to live:~)

So, what’s the point? We all have our own learning style. Your learning style isn’t good or bad; it just is. It’s kind of like being right or left-handed, you were born with it. It’s the way you prefer to take in new knowledge.

Do it my way

One big difficulty with learning styles is that your own style will feel right to you whereas another style may feel wrong to you, especially if you have a strong preference for a certain style.

If this is the case, a person with an opposite style might frustrate you and even drive you crazy.

Here’s an example: Imagine you and a friend are learning a new computer program. You sit down and read all the instructions first before you turn on the program. Whereas, your friend sits down and starts experimenting with the program, without bothering to look at the instructions.

You shake your head at his foolishness, thinking, “If you don’t read the instructions, you could do something wrong.”

He looks at you reading the instructions, thinking, “What a waste of time. I’ll see how far I can get on my own and use the instructions when I need help.”

Neither of you is wrong! Chances are both of you will learn the computer program in the about the same amount of time. You just approach learning this new skill in a different way.

Why is this important?

We don’t get to choose our natural style of learning. We can adjust it to some degree, like I did the Diopter Correction Knob on my camera, but we will prefer, and work best, in our natural style.

This is extremely important to realize when working with other people, helping your children learn, and any form of teaching.

If learning style is taken into account at home, work and school, it’s much easier for people to get along. You don’t get annoyed because someone is left or right handed, you adapt to it. The same is true of different learning styles.

So, take the time to discover how you, your children or fellow workers seem to learn best. Try to find ways to compromise when you run across a different learning style with a co-worker or family member. Make it easier for a child to feel good about learning by understanding their unique learning style.

With learning, there really are many paths to the same destination.

BTW The book in the cover picture doesn’t look quite this bad. I took liberty with this photo in order to make a point. My apologies go to the author, David D. Busch. I really do use your book…a lot:~)

Care to share

Here are some questions for you to consider in the comment box (remember you don’t have to answer them all):

  • What do you know about your learning style? Think about how you might put together a book shelf.
  • What conflicts have you experienced because of different learning styles, for example with a co-worker or a family member?
  • If you are a parent, how do you deal with the learning styles of your children?

Would you like to know more about your learning style? If your answer is yes, check out some of the links below.

Resources: Learning Styles

Because there are so many different theories about learning style, I’m not going to tell you which to choose. Instead, I’m providing the following links of a few of the well-known theories. You can check them out on your own.

The Felder-Soloman Index of LearningStyles© (ILS)

The Felder-Soloman Index of LearningStyles© (ILS) Inventory

Kolb Learning Style

Right brain, Left brain

Right brain, Left brain Inventory

Three learning styles – visual, auditory, and kinesthetic

Three learning styles – visual, auditory, and kinesthetic Inventory

Myers Briggs

Myers Briggs Inventory (this isn’t the full test, but it gives you an idea. The full test is much longer and you need to pay for it.)

Keirsey Termperament Sorter

Keirsey Termperament Sorter Inventory

Mood Music

I’m here, but I’m just a shadow of myself. I couldn’t leave you with nothing to do on Thursday. After all, you have to have your “hit” of A Sharing Connection, right?

So, instead I left you with this post. It’s a mood music post. So, if you don’t like music, you might want to move on.

All you have to is pick your mood and click. I have selected music videos to fit your mood or the mood you want to be in:~) Be aware that some of these videos may cross over into other “moods.”

Make me smile music

I need calming rest music

Inspire me

Make me want to dance

Give me an emotional lift

And last, but not least, for those of you who really need a good cry and we all do occasionally…

Make me cry.

Now, I can’t you leave you on that note, so I’m including one my favorite group videos that will cheer you up. It features an oldie, but goodie:~)

Sara’s Choice

Enjoy and I’ll be back with you soon:~)

My Gift: My Rights

December Holidays

December is a month full of familiar dates – Hanukkah, Christmas, Kwanzaa, New Year’s Eve, Pearl Harbor Day and on goes the list. However, this post isn’t about those dates. It’s about what happened on December 15, 1791, a date not recognized by many calendars. Do you know what that date in history means for the United States?

This day in history

You don’t need to run to Google to look up this date as I’m going to tell you about it. On December 15, 1791, the United States ratified the first ten amendments to the country’s Constitution. These amendments guaranteed certain fundamental rights to the citizens of this newly formed country. They are known as the Bill of Rights.

Don’t worry; this is not a post to give you a history lesson about the Bill of Rights. I’m writing this post because this date and the Bill of Rights remind me of something very important in my own life.

My revolution

Like the young United States of America, there was a time when I wanted to establish my own independence. It was a time when I no longer wanted to be ruled by my past. During this personal revolution, I created a document to remind myself of my own declaration of independence – I wrote my Bill of Rights.

Now, this wasn’t a fancy document and no one ratified it, except me. I simply entitled it; Sara’s Bill of Rights. The original document had 25 amendments, but I’ve added a few since then:~)

When I started to write this post, I pulled out the original, which had been written in 1983. It is now a bit worn and creased from the many times I’ve reviewed it. Each time I read it, I felt empowered all over again. This old, beat-up piece of paper declares that I have certain, undeniable RIGHTS and that these rights deserve to be protected and honored by me.

While I can’t share ALL of the rights I put on this paper (some are very personal), I will share these with you:

I have the right to exist.
I have the right to be loved just because I’m me.
I have the right to protect myself from people who are abusive to me.
I have the right to be emotional.
I have the right to my own happiness that is not dependent on someone else.
I have the right to be okay, even if my childhood wasn’t.
I have the right to be selfish.
I have the right to be giving.
I have the right to love myself, even when someone doesn’t.
I have the right to be proud of my accomplishments and successes.
I have the right to fail and not be a failure.
I have the right to be different and not follow the norm.
I have the right to heal — both myself and others.

I am proud of this document. It reinforces to me that I get to determine my rights about how I want to live and what’s important in this life. It also reminds me that I have my own unique gifts to share. Simply put, this document affirms me.

Without a doubt, Sara’s Bill of Rights was one of the most powerful gifts I ever gave myself.

What about you?

Would you consider creating your own Bill of Rights? It’s not hard to do. Just complete this sentence, “I have the right to….” What words come automatically to your mind?

If you wrote your Bill of Rights, can you share one or more of the rights you would include on your list?

Have you ever written something like this? If so, do you pull it out and review it? Have you ever updated it?